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hearts and our minds, but living in gratitude requires a discipline because as 

human beings we often tend to look for threat, for what is wrong. Seeing the 

giftedness of life requires us to develop tools. 
Angeles Arrien:

 One important tool is called grateful seeing, which is the ability 

to look first at what is working—not to deny what is not working, but to start  

first with what is working. Once we cultivate that, there is so much we can be 

grateful for. 
Rev. O’Brian:

 You make the point that we have a choice about what we bring, 

how we see things, and how we work with them. For example, when we face chal-

lenges there is a tendency to want to constrict, blame, or shut down in reaction. 

But we have the opportunity, through cultivating gratitude, to look at the ways in 

which we are being supported to learn and grow. 
Angeles Arrien:

 I love the word challenge. It is something that ignites growth 

or possibilities to unfold in ways we hadn’t considered. The Navajos have a 

wonderful saying: “Bless those who have challenged us because they remind us of 

doors we have closed and doors we have yet to open.” 
Rev. O’Brian: 

That reminds me of His Holiness the Dalai Lama, who said 

something similar. “Our friends don’t help us nearly as much as our enemies.” In 

order to benefit from these insights, we need a practice, a container. Your book 

provides that as you take us through a year-long journey, month by month, culti-

vating and working with gratitude. 
Angeles Arrien: 

The universal inner and outer tracking tools consist of four 

questions each. The outer tracking questions are:

1. Who or what inspired me today? Anything that can inspire me has meaning; 

otherwise, I wouldn’t have the capacity to be inspired, expanded or motivated 

to something new. 

2. Who or what has challenged me? This shows me where I am growing beyond 

my comfort zone. What did I learn that I really want to remember? 

3. Who or what has surprised me today? This shows me where my attachments 

may be and how I handle uncertainty, or what my flexibility or adaptability 

quotient is, or my connection to resilience. 

4. Who or what has touched or moved me? This shows me that my heart is still 

open. Where I can’t be touched or moved indicates where my heart has begun 

to close.

The internal tracking tools are:

1. Where was I strengthened today? 

2. Where was I softened or did I have some of the prickly edges of my nature 

rounded out?